


As long as there are stars above you

by SwirlsOfBlueJay



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Angst, Coda, Episode Tag, F/M, Fluff, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-06
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2020-01-05 21:24:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18374357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SwirlsOfBlueJay/pseuds/SwirlsOfBlueJay
Summary: Chapter 1 (6x02): What if Jake was around during the detectives vs officers stand-off?Chapter 2 (6x03): Five times Gina saved Jake (a conversation between Jake and Gina)Chapter 3 (6x05): Peraltiago textingChapter 4 (6x15): After Jake gets home from the barChapter 5 (6x16): Jake really likes his fit bit, the squad is less impressed (warning: mentions d/s & shock collars)Chapter 6 (6x06): from Amy's pov as she watches Jake become consumed by the case*New chapter* 5x10: The Secret Santa Incident- Jake causes a redraw, which means Amy is no longer Holt's Secret Santa(A series of episode inspired fics).





	1. Chapter 1

Jake’s working on paperwork when he becomes aware of whispering. Not super-secret personal information whispering, but the whispering of ‘shenanigans’ as Holt would say. Of course Jake bounds over, eager to join the fun. Everyone falls silent.

“You’re not part of this dude,” Rosa states bluntly, “Leave.”

“Come on! You know I can make whatever you guys are doing two hundred percent funner!”

“We’re in a war with the officers,” Terry explains, giving Jake a pointed look, “You know, the ones Amy’s in charge of.” 

“So? Amy and I compete all the time, it’s practically our MO.”

“No Jake.”

He turns to Charles, who winces. “Sorry Jake.”

“I can’t believe this. This is unbelievable. I’m Jake Peralta, inventor of the Jimmy Jabs, the Halloween Heist and Fire-extinguisher Roller-derby. I am the crosser of The Full Bullpen and the Taser of Cantaloupes. And you want to do this without me? I am shocked.”

Drawn by Jake’s loud faux-melodrama, Amy walks over. And then she and Terry say in too-perfect-to-not-be-rehearsed-synchronicity:

“We’re not going to fight over which side you’re on Jake, we’re adults.”

“What are you talking about? I’m a detective. I’m obviously on the detectives’ side.”

To which both Amy and Terry gave him dubious looks.

“You let Amy win half those things you just mentioned: the jimmy jabs. And the apartment bet and last year’s Halloween heist. Terry loves love, but you’re hopeless. I’d give it ten seconds before you turned double agent.”

Amy adds, “And as you just said, you’re a detective Jake, I’m not going to make you go against your own team.”

 

* 

 

And that’s how he ends up as the go-between, officers and detectives alike leaving him files and info and evidence to pass on. He sometimes tells them he’s spying for the other side, but no one believes him.

If someone had told Jake two years ago about an epic war between the detectives and officers where he was Switzerland, he’d have laughed, called them crazy, and said he’d be the one leading the detectives to a spectacular victory, the likes of which had never been seen before. And yet, here he is.

Jake still thinks Rosa and Terry are being unfair. But as he starts smiling, heart filling with joy as he sees Amy running around with a mischievous glint in her eye, he concedes that they might have a point.


	2. 5 times Gina saved Jake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five times Gina saved Jake (a conversation between Jake and Gina)

Jake raises his glass, clinking it with Gina’s, “And thank you, for all twelve times you saved my ass, especially the best of all: being the tattler.”

“Oh sweetie, no way is that the best one, you should know by now my epic self only gets more epic with time.” 

“True,” Jake scrunches up his face in thought, “Okay, saving the precinct and my job, using Ginazone, was pretty awesome.”

“Nope.”

“Saving nana’s apartment and making sure I wasn’t left homeless?”

“Nope.”

“The mall hostage situation? I feel like Charles should get credit there. You were badass though.”

“I wasn’t even counting that in the twelve Jake, if I counted every little thing the number would be closer to a thousand.”  

“Driving the truck into Figgis to stop him from escaping, so that I could leave witness protection in the armpit state and come home?”

“You are terrible at this.”

“Okay, I give up, tell me.”

“Drumroll. The best, number one time I saved your ass, changed your life immeasurably, and stopped you from dying sad and alone in a mouldy pit with nothing but gummy worms as company…”

“Harsh. Also, not you. That’s Amy.”

“Hush…the time I brought you sunshine and happiness with one single line- ‘Well what’s the worst thing in the world for you Santiago?’”

“When was that?” Jake asks, thinking back, but then suddenly something hits him (because despite his goldfish memory he still remembers almost every single thing Amy’s ever said, even before they were together)  he remembers Gina saying that and Amy’s reply, ‘Being one of those girls in Jake’s car’.

Given the trash-talking there was really nothing else Amy would’ve said in response. And so the stakes for the bet were set. Resulting in the ‘worst date ever’ that eventually lead to his and Amy’s relationship.

“Holy crap,” Jake says.

“I know, you should worship me.”

“I already do. But I’ll worship harder.” 

“I’ll hold you to that.”

“Sounds about right, I probably owe you several life debts. And you’re right; the genesis of my relationship with the love of my life definitely belongs at number one on that list.”

“Ugh whatever, you’re such a cheese-ball.”

Jake grins. “Thank you Gina.”

Gina smiles. “You’re welcome, you ridiculous dumpster fire.” 


	3. Peraltiago texting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A series of texts between Jake and Amy during 6x05

 

‘Doug Judy’s dead. At the funeral.’

 

‘Oh no! What happened?? Do you what me to come to be with you?’

 

‘What that’s ridiculous Amy. Why would I need you here?’

 

‘It’s not ridiculous. This is your first major loss.’ 

 

‘It really is! I love how you really know me.’

 

‘Of course I know you babe. You’re my husband. Also, remember when I did that statistical analysis of the likelihood of losing someone when on the force?’

 

‘Oh yeah, you said it was mind-boggling that I’d been an NYPD cop this long without having lost anyone. I’m okay. You don’t have to come.’

 

‘Are you sure? I’m just drinking at Shaw’s, nothing important.’

 

‘You adding nothing important makes it seem like there’s something important. What’s going on?’

 

‘It’s nothing, really.’

 

‘Tell me. I could use a distraction.’

 

‘We’re trying to save Shaw’s from the FDNY.’

 

‘Oh man. They are the worst!’ 

 

‘I know! This is so stupid. I’m coming.’

 

‘Never mind. He was faking’

 

‘Bastard, now I’m definitely coming. I’m going to have words with him. It will be a verbal smack-down of legendary proportions. He’ll end up bawling like a baby and on his knees begging for your forgiveness.’

 

‘Hello five drink Amy.’

 

‘This isn’t the alcohol, I totally could.’

 

‘Oh I know, you’re a complete badass. But he had a good reason, people are trying to kill him, so no ass-kicking please.’

 

‘Fine :(.’ 

 

 

 

‘Plot twist: Trudy Judy (Doug’s sister) was the one stealing the cars all along! She’s going to lead us to Stefano!!!’

 

‘Cool babe, go get him!’

 

 

 

‘Where aaaaaare yoooooouu? This place has all our memooories. The firefighters are going to steal our memorrries. And our after-wedding, whatsit called after-wedding thing. Aaaand funeral speeeeches. And youuuu’ll be gone. Aaaaand I’ll beeee Soooo Aloooone.’

 

Jake Peralta is calling you.

 

Amy Santiago has declined your call.

 

‘I think it’s time to stop drinking.’

‘Amy?’

‘Are you okay?’

‘Ames? Please answer, I’m getting worried.’

‘I just tried to call Rosa and Charles, apparently they’re just as drunk. Surprisingly Hitchcock was the most helpful. I’m on the case right now, but I’ll be there as soon as I can.’

 

 

 

‘This horse is very broom-like.’

 

‘Please tell me someone is taking pictures?’

 

Amy Santiago has sent you a photo.

 

‘This is a picture of the floor. I can’t tell if you’re mocking me or if you’re just that drunk.’

 

 

 

‘Voulez vous couches avec moi?’

 

‘Oui. But first I’m going to pick you up, hold your hair back while you hurl and tuck you into bed so you can sleep this off. I’ll be there in ten.’ 

 

 


	4. Cuddles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 6x15: After Jake gets home from the bar

Jake tries to push his feelings down as he walks home from the bar. He knows Gina’s busy and he shouldn’t make her cancelling on them about him. But it hurts. She’s his oldest friend; they’ve been through so much together. She cares about him. He knows this. He knows he’s being silly. But she _is_ his oldest friend, and if even she has grown tired of him what hope does he have for keeping anyone else around. He’s an idiot. And everyone always leaves. And it’s always his fault. And he’s not good enough to get them to stay. He’s never good enough.

Jake takes a moment to school his facial expression before entering their apartment. He’s usually so eager to tell Amy anything and everything that trying to hide something feels like an untenable weight. But he doesn’t want to talk to her about this. For one it feels like it would be unfair to Gina to place his issues on her and also unfair to Amy to put her in the middle. But it’s mainly that his thoughts are now spiralling into how long it will be before Amy too gets fed up and leaves him. And forcing her to deal with his insecurities yet again seems like a perfect way to get her fed up with him. How many times will she be willing to reassure him before she gets mad that he doesn’t trust her, doesn’t have faith in her.

And he doesn’t know how to explain that he does trust her, so much, with everything. But that sometimes it’s hard, everything is too hard. 

 

* 

 

He manages to get ready for and into bed without speaking to Amy and focuses on his phone like he’s doing something very important that he doesn’t want to be disturbed from.

Amy soon climbs in next to him and starts doing the crossword, it’s an ordinary night like any other. Nothing stands out, nothing to give him away. But she knows anyway, because she always knows.

Amy puts her pen down in a move that’s incredibly deliberate, and asks, “Want to talk about it?”

“No,” Jake replies; his expression pleading for her not to push.

“Okay,” Amy says, but she turns on her side and cuddles him.

And Jake almost sighs in relief, because Amy-cuddles are the best. It doesn’t make everything better, but it makes it easier to forget.

Jake has always been someone who stays up later than he should, but he does it a lot less since being with Amy. However tonight, instead of turning over and going to sleep, he stays on his phone. He doesn’t want to miss a single moment of the feel of having Amy cuddle him. He needs to savour it. Not sleep through it like an idiot.

Jake knows that sounds dumb. After all they’re married now, and it’s not like this is something rare. But, he can’t really help the issues he has, and he can’t help but feel he’ll only have this for a small amount of time. Only have this until she decides to leave.

So he pretends to keep his focus on his phone all while the entirety of it is on Amy.

And it may sound corny but as the hours tick by it’s almost like her hold is healing, pulling the bad thoughts away and replacing them with the notion that there’s nothing to worry about, how could there ever be anything to worry about when Amy chooses to be with him and help him and comfort him. He still feels lousy over the whole Gina situation, but he will be okay.

 


	5. One shock. Two shock.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 6x16 coda: Jake really likes his fit bit, the squad is less impressed (warning: mentions d/s & shock collars)

One shock.

Two Shock.

Electricity fills him.

He breathes.

He blinks.

He can feel himself sliding into sub space.

She speaks.

And he wakes.

 

* 

 

Jake wears the fit bit even more afterwards. Most of the precinct assumes he’s removed the Taser. Amy knows better.

She slides her fingers around his wrist, over the device. He inhales.

“We can get you a real shock collar if you want.”

He swallows. “I want.”

 

*

 

As Amy enters the bullpen she realises that everyone is making their ‘this is an intervention’ expressions. She’s surprised no one told her about it. She assumes it must be an intervention for Jake, after all she doesn’t tend to have habits that result in interventions (sure they result in ceaseless mocking, but not interventions).   

“This is an intervention,” Terry says, but before she can ask Jake what he did Terry continues, “For the two of you.”

Amy startles. “Me? I haven’t done anything!”

“We are instituting a new rule: there is to be no more foreplay during heists,” Holt says.

Oh that. She puts on her best undercover face and says, “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Jake makes a ‘pfft’ sound. 

Holt stares pointedly and says, “Do you really expect us to believe that you both coincidentally came up with the idea for using Tasers on each other in the same year. In addition you both decided it was an acceptable action to take in the same year, suggesting that there’s been previous discussion of said Tasering in another capacity.”

“Also we all saw that little display with Amy putting her hand on Jake’s wrist, you guys aren’t subtle,” Rosa adds. 

Jake just gives a sheepish shrug. Amy almost wants to smack him, but she’s not as mortified as she would’ve been a couple of years ago.

“Sorry,” she says, contrite and a little embarrassed, “In our defence we were genuinely only thinking about the heist.”

“Sure you were,” Terry says.

“We were!” Amy insists.

Holt raises a hand to silence them. “It is irrelevant. We are nonetheless where we are.”  

Amy considers that she needs to know the specifics and minutia of any new heist limitation but decides it’s better not to bring it up, the onus is on the rule –maker to specify and therefore taking advantage of lack of clarity falls in her favour. Also, the whole thing is embarrassing and she just wants it to be over. “Fine, I agree to the new rule.” 

“I agree to nothing!” Jake says.

Amy glares at him and he capitulates. “Fine. We promise to no longer make you all feel inadequate with our superior foreplay skillz.” (The z is, as always, heavily emphasised).

“Yeah, not good enough. Jake has never found a rule he couldn’t bend and Amy will probably make a binder about the technicalities in play. This is why we wrote up this contract for both of you to sign. It states that if you break the rule you forfeit your place in the competition.”

Amy can feel her cheeks getting red as she reads through the items listed on the piece of paper. This is humiliating. She scribbles her signature much quicker than usual so she can get away from the horrible document. 

 

*

 

“Well that was terrible,” Amy tells Jake.

“Yeah. I guess now we need to find something different and epic to bring to the next heist to make them regret everything.”

“Definitely. I have an idea, we should team up!”

“Yes! We’ll be unstoppable!”

 


	6. 6x06: Living that case life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 6x06 from Amy's pov as she watches Jake become consumed by the case

Over the years Amy’s gotten used to dealing with Jake’s spiralling. She knows exactly what to do. To stop Jake spiralling she has to intervene quickly, at the beginning, stopping him before he sinks deeper. Other times she just has to wait until it plays out.

She calls his name, to get his attention, her tone sharp and hard, unyielding. She takes a hold of him, firmly. A solid touch- grounding- unmovable. She doesn’t give his mind a moment to brook defiance. Sometimes her actions may seem harsh to others but she knows it’s for the best in the long run. Whether it’s her exes dick-size, him meeting his sister for the first time, or his various insecurities about being a good husband; most of the time she stops the spiral before it can truly begin.

With this new case however, Amy knows she just has to let the spiral play out. That doesn’t mean she can’t still take care of him though.

*

She texts Kylie asking if they can meet half an hour later because she needs to make sure Jake eats something. In hindsight this is a mistake. She’s barely through the door before Kylie says,

“Okay, the first thing you’re going to do is explain why you have to reschedule _your_ plans just to make your husband food. Please tell me you see what a red flag that is.”

“It’s not like that. He’s completely consumed working a case and he’s not looking after himself. I’ve been asleep the last two nights when he got home. And I’m pretty sure he hasn’t eaten in the last two days. I just got some take-out and wanted to make sure he actually ate it. And he’s usually very attentive; it’s just been this past month while he’s been working this case.”  

“He’s been doing this for a month?! An entire month. He’s spent a quarter of your marriage so far staying out at all hours, ignoring you, and just letting you bring him food!”

“I’ve done the same to him,” she replies. And it’s true. Neither of them would have done well in a marriage where the other person was a pining-waiting-at-home-for-their-return type. “It’s the job.”

“Okay fine. But I’ve got my eye on him,” Kylie says.

Amy shrugs. “To be honest, the whole thing is a bit of a relief; he was going a bit over-board with the trying to be the perfect husband thing. You know he has issues from his parents’ marriage. But I was beginning to get him to calm down before the case came up. So hopefully afterwards everything will go back to normal again.”

Kylie shakes her head. “Amy, if your man is going over the top trying to be perfect, you need to encourage that!”

She laughs, and deciding it’s a bad idea to mention Terry’s broken car windows, just says, “I really don’t.”

*

Amy’s on the couch and Jake’s on the floor beside her, various papers for his case spread haphazardly all over the carpet. She has her laptop open and is figuring out the rota for the next patrol schedule; if he’s working she might as well get some of her work done too.

She notices before he does that the hunched pouring over the evidence is hurting his neck (unsurprising, given he’s so overly-focused), if his confused humming is anything to go by. She reaches down and begins massaging the nape of his neck. Jake sighs contentedly and leans back into her touch.

Amy already knows most details of the case: Jake had excitedly relayed every detail to her in his first week or so on the case, before he had completely fallen down the rabbit hole. So she knows enough to answer many of the random mutterings he throws out into the air, with ideas of her own.

It startles her slightly the first time he says, “Thank you room.” And she knows some may be insulted, but Amy finds it half-amusing and half-adorable. (Though she does make a note to herself to get try and get him to sleep more because this level of sleep deprivation can’t be good).

*

She sits with Terry as they eat their lunch. They’ve taken to meeting up since she became sergeant to discuss their respective squads (i.e. gossip, rant and come up with progressively more creative (crazier) methods of dealing with situations). Even though she knows the answer that’s coming, she still asks,

“So how’s your squad?”

Terry’s mouth pinches into a circle and he gives Amy a look, “Oh they’re fine, you know, except your husband has gone insane!”

Amy nods. “Yeah he’s spiralling pretty hard, he just needs to work through it though; he’ll be fine once he solves the case.”

“He can’t solve the case. There are no leads. No suspects. It’s unsolvable.”

Amy gives Terry a soul-piercing stare and states, with absolute certainty, “He’ll solve the case.”

*

Her alarm rings, though on its quietest setting, it’s still shrill and piercing at two in the morning. She quietly walks into the living room. His back is to her, shaking, fingers jittering, papers and evidence spread out in front of him.

“Jake!”

He jumps, turning towards her, eyes wild, his mouth opening in protest of what he knows is coming. Her hand lands firm on his shoulder.

“Bed. Now.”

His argument falls silent. His trembling stills. He follows her to bed, stretches beneath the covers, stress leeching out of him. And she can’t help but admire herself for having this affect. She knows in a few hours he’ll be up again, crazily pouring over evidence. But at least she can get him to rest for a precious little while.

*

Amy knows by the way that Jake comes bounding into the first floor of the precinct that’s he’s finally solved the case.

“Ames! Amy! Guess what!”

She still patiently replies, “What?”

“I solved the case!!”

His grin is wide and she loves it, loves him so much. She gives him a responding grin and says, “Congratulations, I knew you could do it!”

“Really? Because everyone else has been saying it’s unsolvable.”

“Never had a doubt.”

*

It’s later, after the excitement and adrenaline have calmed, and Amy can see the exact moment when Jake realises he’s pretty much ignored her for the last couple of months. His expression turns to contrition and panic. And he’s running out of the precinct before she can stop him.

*

He shows up at their apartment two hours later with flowers and peirogies and hot chocolate and apologies spilling from his lips.

He doesn’t say that he’s been a terrible husband or that he’s such a screw up because he’s not going to guilt trip her or make her reassure him in the middle of an apology. She knows he’s thinking it though.

Amy knows she needs to stop this now or she’ll be dealing with Jake-brand-grand-gesture apologies for the next month.

She places her hands on his shoulders. “Jake. Everything’s fine. If I had a problem with it I would’ve told you. I know it’s part of the job and you’ve had to deal with the same from me.”

“Not like this, not for this long. It’s not fine. You shouldn’t have to put up with this. I’m going to make it up to you. And I’ll be better, I can be better.”

There are tears in his eyes and she knows he’s thinking about his father.

“Do you know what I love about our relationship Jake? You understand when I have to leave in the middle of something because of a break in a case. And even if you’re disappointed, you’re happy for me. I don’t have to spend time I don’t have on reassurances and placating. One of the reasons we work is because we’re both so dedicated to this job. I love all the parts of you, and getting this obsessed with the job is part of you too. We don’t have to be perfect. We just have to be someone who makes the other happy. And we can do that by being ourselves.” 

Jake nods, shifting closer to her, “I know. I love that too. But just because it makes it easier, that doesn’t always make it okay.”

Amy sighs, sliding her hands from Jake’s shoulders to his neck. “I suppose we do sometimes take each other a bit for granted. How about this, we both try to be ten percent more present when we are consumed by work.”

Jake’s eyes are still shining, but his smile is real, “Perfect.”  

 


	7. Desperate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 5x01: Jake is desperate to see Amy

Jake wakes happy, for once (it’s visiting day). Prison is the worst. The food is terrible. Everything is terrible. He spends his days filled with fear and despair. And he’s been white-knuckling his way through, waiting for this moment: the day he gets to see Amy again. He’s drawn to this day, a light in the hollow dark, a stream in the desert, a life-line to cling to on storm-addled seas.  
  
Jake savours the precious moments of being in her arms. (It’s respite, it’s salvation).  
  
And then the alarm sounds, and the guards drag him away. Too soon, too soon, too soon. He shouts, anguish and desperation fills him. He can’t wait another three weeks before seeing her again. He can’t. He can’t. He can’t.  
  
He needs this. He needs her. He’s been holding onto this for so long. Too long.  
  
He keeps his eyes on her as he’s pulled away. (It’s the last desperate gulp of air before drowning).  
  
  
*  
  
  
He needs to see Amy. He feels so desperate and alone and broken. He can’t survive here without her.  
  
(And he wants to tell her how he’s feeling, he should. But he doesn’t know how to tell her this without it turning into a guilt-trip. He doesn’t know how to tell her this without it sounding coercive and cruel, given he knows there’s a reason she’s not here: she’s working her hardest to get him out. He doesn’t know how to explain it to her without his words turning into a begging, pleading mess, asking for things she has no power to give him. She has a career to keep on track after all, and she’s probably already spending too much of her time on his case).  
  
And so he does what he has to. He submits himself to a beating; again and again and again.  
  
He begs and bribes and borrows. He gets himself thrown in solitary. He joins a dangerous gang. And makes a deal that will likely get him shanked, if not killed.  
  
All for a phone. (All so he can hear her voice).  
  
And Jake knows, if he told her, that he was going to risk his life just for this, she would be here in a heart-beat. That’s maybe why he doesn’t.  
  
  
*  
  
  
And he sits in his cell. His world burning around him, the possibility of death a live-wire beneath his fingers.  
  
The phone sits in his hands like Holy Grail. And her voice drowns out the pain, steadies him, anchors him. Brings joy and relief.  
  
He can survive another day.


	8. 5x10: The Secret Santa Incident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 5x10: The Secret Santa Incident- Jake causes a redraw, which means Amy is no longer Holt's Secret Santa

Amy’s always given her teachers and mentors great gifts. Every year since Kindergarten she’s meticulously picked out presents that her mentors would enjoy but would also represent what she had learned. That show she knew the vital lessons they had taught her and appreciated them greatly. She had had a spotless record of excellent gift giving, right up until Holt.

She thought back on years of her failed attempts to give captain Holt gifts, from the many returned gifts of their first year together, to the ‘this-is-just-my-old-racket’ ruse. From the collage that resulted in revealing Holt’s mistake on an old case and street-meat that made him unwell, to the most spectacular failure which had resulted in Holt calling a bomb threat. It was incredibly frustrating.

(Also thinking about the fact that the last time she had a successful mentor gift-giving experience it was with her old mentor, who was later found to be a complete asshole, made her feel a bit nauseous. But she tries not to think about that too much). 

What made it all the more irksome was that Holt was her best mentor ever. She just wanted him to know how much she appreciated his help over the years.

Amy told herself it wasn’t really important anymore, their relationship had come such a long way, after all they had been through they were more than mentor and mentee; they were friends. And she knew Holt knew how much he meant to her, that he didn’t need a present to show it. But still.

 

*

 

Amy picks a piece of paper from the Secret Santa hat, as always hoping for Holt’s name to be on it, but expecting it not to be. And then she sees it: ‘Raymond Holt’. This is the best thing ever! She’s so excited. After all this time, and all her efforts, this time she gets to give him a gift and he has to accept it! She manages to stop herself from doing a victory dance but can’t control her delight from showing on her face. (That’s her mistake, really she should know better). 

Jake makes a _very public_ comment about her making a bedroom face and she’s definitely going to punish him for it later in said bedroom. He’s revealing everyone’s Secret Santa’s, but she’s too busy being amused by her fiancé’s antics to really see what’s coming.  It’s only when Holt begins voicing his suggestion that she realises what Jake has done.

No. No. No. No. This can’t be happening. She was so close, so close. She was finally going to be allowed to give Holt a gift. But everyone agrees to the redraw and Amy has to accept it. She reluctantly drops her slip of paper back into the hat, glaring at Jake the entire time.

 

*

 

Jake sees Amy’s glare and suddenly realises there’s a consequence to his actions far worse than him not getting a Secret Santa present. Amy isn’t going to be able to get a present for Holt. Oh, he’s in so much trouble. 

He follows her into the evidence lock-up.

“Hey, I’m sorry you had to put Holt’s name back in,” he says, nervously rubbing the back of his neck with his hand.

Amy sighs. “I don’t know why I’m surprised. You’re so keen to show off you don’t always think through how it affects others. I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.”

And oh, that hurts. “I’ll make it up to you.”

“It’s fine,” Amy says, but her tone is curt. And her smile is skewed.

 

*

 

Jake feels terrible. This is their first (and given the May wedding, only) Christmas as an engaged couple and he has ruined it already. It feels like he’s just going to keep messing up and it’s all going to be down-hill from here.

And Amy’s going to finally realise she’s way too good for him. That she needs someone as smart as her, and as thoughtful as her, someone who thinks things through.

Is it really fair to her to try to convince her otherwise, he wonders?

He still gets tulips which are Amy’s favourite and has the card written in Garamond (her favourite font). And also picks up the new holiday folders she has been eyeing. It’s not the most romantic of gifts but he knows she’ll love them more than she would jewellery.

“I really am sorry,” Jake says, and the words sound way too desperate for his liking. He doesn’t want to guilt her into forgiving him. But he’s feeling pretty desperate.  

Amy’s expression softens and she smiles at him and it’s not sharp-edged like before and he feels like he can breathe again.

“Thank you, these are lovely.” She steps towards him. “I’m sorry too. What I said was unfair. I was upset. You’re literally one of the most thoughtful people I know. Forgive me?”

“Of course.”

They snuggle on the sofa while Amy excitedly talks about the new folders. And all is right with the world.

Buoyed by cuddles, Jake gets another idea, a better idea, because he’s going to be better, he’s going to be worthy of Amy. He’s going to fix it so Amy is Holt’s Secret Santa again.

 

*

 

First he needs to find out who has Holt.

“Why are you trying to ruin Secret Santa again? Come on man!” Terry says.

“I just need to find out who has Holt so Amy can switch with them.”

Terry just shakes his head and wanders off which Jake takes as permission to continue.

He quickly discovers Charles is Holt’s Secret Santa. Mainly due to Charles immediately telling him, but Jake’s still going to say that’s due to his incredible detective skills.

 

*

 

“I’ve fixed it! All you have to do is switch with Charles,” he tells Amy.

“Thank you for trying, but I can’t switch with Charles.”

“What, of course you can! He gets to make us happy; you’ll be doing him a favour!”    

“I can’t switch because I am Charles’ Secret Santa.”

Damn. “Okay, I can totally make this work. I’ll just get someone else to switch with Charles first.”

“No, Charles will figure out why.”

“He won’t, I’ll be stealthy like a cat.” 

Amy gives him a dubious look. “Okay then.”

 

*

 

Jake considers his options. He obviously can’t go to Holt, Rosa isn’t taking part and Hitchcock and Scully will definitely give the game away. That leaves Terry.

“I need you to tell Charles you want to switch with him.”

“Are you still on this?”

“Please?”

“No Jake.”

“Come on Sarge, this is for love! I thought Terry loved love.”

Terry scowls. “Terry does love love. Okay fine, but if you ruin Secret Santa…”

“I won’t. Promise. Thanks Sarge!”  

 

*

 

“So am I awesome or am I awesome?”

Amy carefully holds the slip of paper saying ‘Raymond Holt’ in her hands. And despite his gloating, and the fact that he caused the issue in the first place, she can’t help but smile adoringly at her ridiculous fiancé.

It’s okay though, his returning smile is just as adoring.

 

 

 


End file.
